Can't Fight Fate

I remember when I was a little girl,I loved going to church.I often felt the need to be closer to the Lord.I couldn't get enough knowledge about him. I used to imagine how would it feel not to breathe again and be apart of the universe.It was kinda scary,but I had been taught that Jesus would come back and I wanted to know what and where heaven was.

I was baptized November 19,1982 a few weeks before my ninth birthday. A lot had happened that year. That April my beloved Uncle Frank retired and spent all the time he could with me.I had no idea he was dying.Between chemo and cancer,his 6'5 265 pound body had shriveled to 98 pounds. 

August 8,1982 my hero died.

My aunt had no idea that my so called performance at church was really my decision to live for the Lord. I told her later if I had told her the truth,I knew she wouldn't allow me to do it. She said I was right. 

The Lord called me again at thirteen. I went to a youth conference and I got saved. I felt empowered as I recited the sinners prayer, only to have it all crashing down when my aunt told me I couldn't become a nun. She had a lot of anger with church. Later in life I found the reason why. When I got older I saw the same things,but I am never one to not give someone a chance because of what someone else did.I come from a religious background,and one thing they teach is forgiveness.

While many people come to Jesus after going through years of drug and alcohol use. I always came cause I seeked him, yet I never stayed because I felt alone,and had nothing to do.I didn't want to be a member that just sat in the pews and screamed amen from time. I wanted to be apart of the work. I wanted to organize activities, start programs,write skits,be a blessing. I never was concerned about recognition,because I wanted it to matter when it mattered the most and that was with God.

 

To be Continued........................