What is it about me though.....

From the age of 4-18 I experienced some form of physical,mental,or sexual abuse.I remember this man saying reach in my pocket.I was four had no idea it was wrong,yet my babysitter saw me and spanked me.She said you dont do that! Looking back at it,why didn't he get in trouble?This same man was allowed to take me across the street to his house to go get "candy". He used to stick his tongue in my mouth and say your so pretty.I was four. he was OLD! I went through several episodes like this.

By the time I was in the sixth grade I was a loose cannon.I was always picked on, beaten, talked about and just plan mistreated.My aunt used to date a married man,and if he stayed too long at our house,he took me home so that his wife wouldn't get mad.Those rides were torture.No one seemed to care that I was angry and bitter.
My mom said she wish I was never born,well many times,so did I .
People often ask,Why didn't you tell?
Who was I going to tell when it felt like I was part of an arrangement.
I felt like I had been sold to the highest bidder.
I was promised to several people before I was born. My aunt got to keep me.
When Uncle Frank died, that was the end for me.
I was almost raped by the man who had been molesting me after my uncle died.On top of that I was told it was my fault.
Years later I found my biological father and moved to NY to live with him. Before I moved,my Godmother said to me,be careful,don't let your guard down.
I never thought I would need that advice,yet I took it anyway.No one could have prepared me for what I was about to endure at the hands of the one person who was supposed to love me. Yes I wear scares from my father.

I never understood why I experience these things in my life,until now. My story is mine to tell,but someone else has lived the same scene.